#tenqueries I’ve realized more and more that many writers fail to establish a character’s drive right off the bat. If we don’t know what they want or are trying to do by the time that first or second page ends, we won’t be able to relate. Even if it’s just getting to the office,

One of my biggest pet peeves that A LOT of writers struggle with is sentence structure. Natural voice ebbs and flows. It has fragments, and maybe it has run-ons too, but it’s not repetitive. Vary your sentence structures and play with your noun/verb placements! #tenqueries

Instead, it’s usually, “There’s not a car in sight,” or “There’s no cars around here.” If you’re not writing your voice how you would normally speak or think, it won’t be fluidly read and relatable/fluid to your readers either! #tenqueries

I have a really hard time connecting to voices that are super proper. If you’re not using contractions, I think you’re lying to yourself and your readers. 😂 Most people speak and think in contractions. We don’t take the time to say, “There is not a car in sight.” #tenqueries ...

Ohh...nice query. Solid opening pages...intriguing, and a main character you hate to love and love to hate...

Going to save this one for another day and come back to it. I have quite a few submissions in my box and want to get that down a bit before requesting more. #tenqueries

When you ask for a 1-2 page synopsis and end up with a three sentence one instead...and then spend your entire query talking about yourself, not the book...Oy... #tenqueries Might want to work on that and refine that...

One thing I’m not a fan of are books that start by addressing this is a story:
-It all started with a phone call.
-If I knew back then what I know now.
-I never knew what was coming for me that day.

Just jump in! This is subjective, but your story doesn’t need it! #tenqueries

Q10: Adult mystery. I'm on the fence about this one, which usually means I err on the side of requesting more. I can always pass at a later date. No harm in taking a shot. #tenqueries

Q9: Sports NF. Seems very encyclopedia/almanacky. Tough to place these with major publishers, and most of these kinds of books have been replaced with online databases and internet archives. Pass. #tenqueries

Q8: MG Horror. Author seems to be struggling with believable dialogue. Writing dialogue is hard enough as it is; that goes double for adults trying to capture realistic children's voices. #tenqueries

Q7: Author asking permission to resubmit; she has done revisions and altered the MS significantly based on feedback I gave her last year. Polite, professional, and respectful, with no assumptions. Will for sure take a 2nd look. #tenqueries

Q6: MG adventure. Sounds really cool, but a bit similar to something I'm already working on right now. Plenty of room for both books, but it might get tricky having them both on my list. Tough pass. #tenqueries

Q5: Self-published, 250K words. Absolutely nothing I can do with this one. Pass. #tenqueries

Q4: Middle Eastern espionage thriller, terrorist plot. I'm exhausted by these novels, and it's just too saturated a market. Pass. #tenqueries

Q3: Opened with an "Are You Afraid of the Dark?" reference, which is a great way to get my attention - personalized queries go a long way. Writing isn't there, though. Pass. #tenqueries

Q2: Psychological thriller, 1st person present. This has become a very popular POV as of late, and it's great if done right, but it doesn't quite work here. Pass. #tenqueries

Q1: Military NF. Every military story is important and meaningful, but not all of them are salable in a very crowded market. That's the case here. Pass. #tenqueries

Q10: YA contemp. Word count too low, even if it were MG contemp. Good concept. Writing sample, however, showed unrealistic dialogue, quick shifts in tense and POV. Pass. #tenqueries

Q9: Opens with, "My book does not contain X, Y, or Z. You can send your automated rejection now." Pass. #tenqueries

Why are you shooting yourself in the foot automatically? Pitch the book. Show me what it IS rather than telling me what it is NOT.

Q8: YA contemp. Funny, engaging, unique job, incredibly relatable fears. Writing in sample showed that same wit and anxiety in a tightly constructed, snappy scene. Partial! #tenqueries #querywin