Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

Q10: YA contemp. Word count too low, even if it were MG contemp. Good concept. Writing sample, however, showed unrealistic dialogue, quick shifts in tense and POV. Pass. #tenqueries

Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

Q9: Opens with, "My book does not contain X, Y, or Z. You can send your automated rejection now." Pass. #tenqueries

Why are you shooting yourself in the foot automatically? Pitch the book. Show me what it IS rather than telling me what it is NOT.

Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

Q7: YA contemp. Great pitch, intriguing concept, definitely a story that should be shared. Writing in sample was all dialogue/white space, telling instead of showing. Pass. #tenqueries

Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

Q6: F. Stellar query/premise, intense obstacles, tangible world. Comp'd a client title. Writing in the sample too vague & grand, stilted dialogue. Sad pass. #tenqueries

When writing fantasy, focus on MC's immediate scene in opening chapters, then expand out. Not world/backstory.

Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

Q5: Defined as NA Fantasy, then at the end of the sentence YA Urban Fantasy. Continued to tell me about the story in the most vague sense, no specifics apart from a character name. Pass. #tenqueries

"Running for one's life/saving the world" is fantasy at large. Be specific.

Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

Q3: YA HF. Good comp titles, good premise, underrep'd time period and voices. The writing in the sample full of cliches, stilted dialogue, and opened in the wrong place for the story. Pass. #tenqueries

Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

Q2: F. Arthurian retelling, using the same names & plot. Pass. #tenqueries

I like the legend of King Arthur & I like novels inspired by it. But that's the key word: inspired. Your plot have twists from the original. Consider changing names & settings too. Make it stand out.

Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

Q1: "General fiction." A whole query in questions. I've no idea what this is about. Pass. #tenqueries

Please refrain from opening queries with philosophical questions, "what would you," etc. #querytip

Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

Q9: "I don't read stories similar to what I write. I think [x] audience would enjoy this, but I don't know -- I haven't actually read any of those books they like." Pass. #tenqueries

You need to be familiar with the market/genre/audience you're writing in/for. It's not optional.

Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

Q8: Opens with questions, continued throughout. "Did you ever wonder..." "What would you do if..." Pass. #tenqueries

My teachers always said to never start an essay with "[Word] is defined as..." And now I'm telling you to never start/continue a query with pointless questions.

Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

Q6: F. "My manuscript is a 468,000-word..." Pass. #tenqueries

Honey, NOBODY is going to read that. That's nearly 2,000 pages. Cut 3/4 of it and you'll stand a better chance. Even The Greats in genre fiction don't have 2,000 pages.

Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

Q5: Thriller (don't rep). Told me what the ms is (themes, plot structure, philosophy) and isn't (genre), but didn't share *the story*. Pass. #tenqueries

A query is like a book jacket. Set the stage with your MC, leave a hook, and let the reader discover what the MS is or isn't.

Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

Q4: YA HF. Neat concept, certainly a different look at this period of history. However, sample writing provided = unappealing to a modern YA audience because it (1) reads like a textbook (dates, facts, figures) and (2) did not open with a scene/follow an MC. Pass. #tenqueries

Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

Q2: YA F. 5 paragraphs about why I should rep the writer, 1 paragraph about the world of the story. Pass. #tenqueries

SFF pitches are hard! But you need your reader to be interested in your *MC* first and foremost, and why we need/want to follow THEM on this fantastical journey.

Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

Q1: Starting off a query with poor, snarky attitude (like what's pictured) is not the path one should take in finding an agent. Yes, you'll stand out...but not in the right way. Why would I want to work with you with that negative impression? Pass. #tenqueries

Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

#tenqueries Q9: HF. Very well-written query, with a hook and enticing premise. Unique perspective in an otherwise saturated topic. However, the writing in the sample needed more revision; it didn't grab me. Pass.

Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

#tenqueries Q8: UF/PR. Told me about how the writer wrote it, the themes they used, the message they want to get across. Nothing about characters, plot, hook, etc. Pass.

Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

#tenqueries Q7: YA C. The query was kind of all over the place, which suggests the manuscript is all over the place. Where does your story begin? What are your MC's motivations and obstacles? Entice me. Pass.

Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

#tenqueries Q5: A F. The query was fine––everything was there, written well, etc––but the writing in the sample just plain didn't capture my attention. In a market bursting with West Euro magic royalty narratives, it really needs to stand out. Pass.

Laura Crockett
@LECrockett
Literary Agent
Literary Agent @TriadaUS | Opinions my own | she/her
148 MSWL
24 AskAgent
322 Queries
88 Tips

#tenqueries Q3: Opened by insulting literary agents, stating we do not give full consideration to queries, so if there was something the writer ought to improve in the pitch we ought to state where and why.

...Pass.